BBNaija: The Tega Trouble
By: Deji Yesufu
So I eventually got caught in the BBNaija show and the issues around it. Those of us public commentators cannot avoid it as it is indeed the talk of social rounds in Nigeria, if not around the world. The central issue right now revolve around three personalities: two were involved in the show and one was not. These persons are Boma, Tega and Tega’s husband. For those who have not been following the show, here is a brief recap.
Boma and Tega were two of the twenty housemates in the show. Boma is male. Tega is female. Tega, incidentally, is married and came to the house making it clear she was somebody’s wife. However the BBN show throws up a lot of uncertainties, especially around sexual escapades. Somehow Tega and Boma became attracted to each other and had sex on live TV – a few times. The week the incidence happened, social media around Nigeria went agog.
I don’t watch the show so I didn’t see the sex scenes but you cannot miss the news on social media. While a lot of people cried out against the fact of a married woman sleeping with a man on live TV, something else got my attention. It was the fact that Nigerians still possessed a working moral compass. Here is the thing: the moment these two committed the act, the uproar against them was so much, they were evicted from the house that very weekend. Not only that, people sought the views of the husband of Tega. The gentleman said this: that he couldn’t understand why his wife would do a thing like this. He said his wife was “God fearing”; that they both agreed that she was to go to the house as a married woman. Now this. He ended his discuss, though, by saying his wife made a mistake and he’s willing to have her back.
This is what elicited this article: Tega just published a video where she tearfully called on Nigerians and her husband to forgive her. She said she made a mistake and that her mental health was not alright. She asked to be supported henceforth.
I do not wish to center my essay on the sexscapade. Truth is that non of us is holy; all of us are sinners in the hand of an angry God. I wish to center my thoughts on what Tega’s husband said after his wife slept with another man on live TV. He said, and I paraphrase, that he didn’t know his wife could do a thing like that. He said that the person he was viewing was clearly not his wife. Etc. After listening to him, I realized that a little theology would have helped these people in whatever quest they had embarked on at BBN.
The Bible states that every one of us is sinful. The picture of man that scripture paints is one of total depravity. Here is the thing: without restraint, every one of us can become a Hitler. Without restraint the holiest man can become a Tiger Wood. Without restraint, the most upright lady can become a Tega. Restraints and healthy boundaries is what is keeping us and not the fact that there is any thing good within us.
The most important thing that a morally upright individual must do is not to attend a Big Brother Africa show. That’s the first boundary that must not be crossed. Tega’s husband must have been smoking cheap weed for him to think that his wife will go to a show with ten virile, muscular and sex starved young men, and not have one of them sleep with her. The BBN show is known for the latitude that the producers give for house mates to have casual sex among themselves. It bothers me that Big Brother will give all sort of rules in the house, yet ignore the most important rule: chastity. Well, with one marriage heading for the rocks I hope other couples will jump at the opportunity of going to BBN.
Yorubas say that what a child will not eat, he doesn’t spend his day sniffing at. Tega is to be blamed for her actions but everyone should also bear their wrong. Boma, the man, should also bear the brunt of sleeping with another man’s wife. I don’t know how he would feel facing Tega’s husband now. Tega’s husband also has his blame. And the rest of us giving the BBN popularity have our blame too.
Let me end this essay on a positive note: I am thoroughly impressed with the moral compass of Nigerians that know that there is something inherently wrong with sleeping with another man’s wife. While I will not excuse the depravity of mind that celebrates sex on TV, I am grateful that we still see this as wrong. Note however the problem with moral compasses: they don’t improve; it deteriorates with time. Thus soon enough Nigerians will see nothing wrong with sleeping with another person’s wife on live TV. Until then behold thine heart, o Nigeria: know thine depravity.